Light and fluffy. Light and fluffy. Must try harder.
If this 8 seconds of video doesn’t make you smile, I don’t know what will 
This is Bene in his new Stokke Sleepi. There is no way we could have afforded this – he would have had a travel cot – but we were gifted it by Stokke. I didn’t have to blog about it but I am doing because I LOVE it. It is gorgeous quality, was insanely easy to put together (I did it, this is amazing) and perfect in every way. The mattress is lovely and comfy (but our sensor mat works through it… perfect) and it feels really solid. I love that it is on wheels, so being in front of our (rarely used) wardrobe isn’t a problem and I adore the modular-ness of it. The mattress will drop lower and one side will come out to become a bed. When he’s older we can buy an add on kit to lengthen it out to a bed that will suit him until he’s much older. It can even separate out and become two chairs if we want. In short, it’s furniture for life.
There are sheets you can buy (and bumpers) but I’ve settled for a cream fleece tucked in for now. There are patterns on the internet to make shaped sheets; I’ll get some nice flannelette at some point.
He still sleeps all night every night; he’s even going to bed a little earlier.
Yesterday he looked like this for most of the afternoon though after passing out following a 40 minute (count ‘em) tantrum post jabs. Poor boy.
Today he looks more like this though
With some of this.
And a fair bit of this.
Last night I reread an old post I wrote on depression once before. In the comments someone asked why I was miserable when I had such a wonderful life. *wry smile* It’s not the way it works, of course, I know that as well as all the people who commented back. But maybe if I fake that hard enough, it’ll work.
It’s a beautiful life. And I’ve only got this one. And I can’t change anything. Must. Try. Harder.
Just don’t forget to be kind to yourself in amongst all the ‘trying harder’. If ‘trying harder’ could vanquish depression, then most of us would be able to manage it.
“He still sleeps all night every night; he’s even going to bed a little earlier.”
Blimey. That took years for ours and, in fact, judging by the 1am questions that sometimes arrive at my bedroom door, I guess it’s still not happening for both of my kids!
I second what Liz said above Merry. I have a wonderful family, fantastic friends, a lovely house and a good life but I still need anti depressants. Trying harder to be happy doesn’t always work. You are unique and no one is going to grieve like you, you cannot compare yourself to anyone else even if they have been through something similar to you. You have been on such an emotional rollercoaster over the last few years with more twists, turns and loop the loops than anyone would wish to deal with. Don’t try and hide your emotions, they are what makes you you. You are a good person.
ummmm – could I please have the sleepi thing? I need it.
Oh, little sister, if i could, I would.
I’m hogging your comments, Merry, to make sure that you and your friends know about The Elephant in the Room. It’s Mind’s online support group on Facebook and IT WORKS. We’ve also got some spin-offs into private groups so we can get to know each other better.
I’m going to do some training in providing peer support online – it’s great because with a group there’s always going to be at least one person who is not in the pit and can help others who are. And believe me, even when you’re feeling really gross and inadequate you can send virtual love and hugs.