Comments on: Notes on a Baby

By: Helen P

Helen P — Wed, 16 Dec 2009 14:44:08 +0000

I remember feeling like that with my youngest child, that I was definitely pushing my luck after previous easy pregnancies and healthy children – and she was only number 3! Nobody could really understand why I didn’t enjoy that pregnancy much at all, after I had loved being pregnant the first two times.

Even now I look at her and think what a precious extra gift she was; I hope very much you have the same experience, and you are in my thoughts as you come to terms with all the previous baggage. *hugs*

By: Happyasharry

Happyasharry — Tue, 15 Dec 2009 18:11:14 +0000

sending hugs.

I had this with Joe and its the phew after giving birth its actually all okay now.

Rachel

By: merry

merry — Tue, 15 Dec 2009 11:34:56 +0000

Thank you for the hugs. This one has been tricky but i don’t deserve sympathy for any previous problems – well except that i bizarrely i am para 9 on this set of notes as 3 ordinary very early miscarriages became more relevant once i bled with this one. I’d never have counted them otherwise. But the other, the one i don’t ever stop grieving about, that one i have to take a lot of responsibility for and it gets no easier.

Jo, the circumstances aren’t the same and it is easy for me to think i deserve problems without thinking that you do – you definitely don’t in Merryland logic – but i can’t apply the same to me. It is annoying that i wouldn’t apply my own logic to anyone else in my own circumstances.

By: kellyireland

kellyireland — Tue, 15 Dec 2009 10:37:37 +0000

I came close to losing the youngest two of my four, and I am so thankful that they are here. Having read your post I felt compelled to hug them both just because I can.

I am always surprised how many women (and men to be fair) have suffered the loss of a baby. At a toddler group a while ago I mentioned it and nearly every woman in the room had some experience of it.

I also felt the fear of “what ifs”with my last, thinking I had pushed my luck to have three such beautiful children already, but every thing was fine and he’s now walking around, a vibrant, slighltly challenging 18 month old.

((Hugs)) Enjoy the kicking – it’s what I miss most!

By: Liz

Liz — Mon, 14 Dec 2009 17:14:08 +0000

I hope it works out for you all.

I’ve only had 1 pregnancy that survived and I’m so grateful that she’s now 8 (I’ve been reading your blog for home ed inspiration for a number of years). To honour and have feelings for the other ones is to me a perfectly normal and natural response for a mother.

By: JennyLesley

JennyLesley — Mon, 14 Dec 2009 16:34:53 +0000

Merry, you just reminded me of the fears I had when I was expecting Fergus. It seems quite common to feel this way, which probably doesn’t help when you are feeling it but you are certainly not alone (although always unique in the beautiful way you express yourself and think things through). Lots of hugs,

Jenny